Good Old Product Review

An awesome form of humor that can be found online today (more easily found online than anywhere else) is the rant. Usually comprised of sarcasm, cynicism, and a large portion of trash-talking, the rant can be applied to a plethora of topics. One man, known online as Maddox, who has mastered the art of the rant, frequently shares his opinion with the rest of the world on The Best Page in the Universe. His latest rant reviews the iPhone, a new Apple product that everyone seems to be in love with (or doesn't have). Needless to say, the iPhone doesn't score as high on his awesome meter as it has on the rest of the world's.

He begins the review in a slightly abnormal way, putting his thesis statement right in the title of the post: "The iPhone is a piece of shit..." It's short and to the point, and the expletive foreshadows the tone of the following piece. Next he speaks directly to his fans who have no doubt asked him whether or not he will be purchasing his own iPhone. He introduces his current Nokia E70 as the main reason why he will not be switching. The rest of his post uses a compare and contrast method to point out the flaws of Apple's new phone as well as showcase the features of his E70.

My personal favorite part of the review is his "non-biased, side-by-side comparison of some key features of each phone." Here's a guy who, in 10 years of posting, has yet to make a single unbiased comment (when the opportunity for an opinionated one exists). Of course, his comparison is anything but unbiased, but you have to give him credit for the features he chooses to list: "Screen turns into a smudgy piece of shit after a few minutes of use... Holds your phone hostage to Apple..." etc.

I think it's the merciless insults flying around that make Maddox so funny to me. It gets back to my original post where I said that people love to laugh at the expense of others. I'm sure if I had an iPhone I'd take this a little more personally, but as it is I can just laugh at those that do.

Also, I did not mention the "your face" joke as the second part of the title. The "your face" joke is the last years joke that never went out of style, while never actually being in style. I'm not going to try to explain it; some people find it funny, while others don't. As I'm sure Maddox would agree, the proper use of the joke is saved strictly for those with a more mature taste in humor (or for those who scored above 125 on the IQ test...).

Maddox doesn't always review things like he did on this post, but he certainly always has something to rant about. If you liked this review, he's got 10 years of material you'd probably like as well.

Serious content: You may consider finding more sources before making a decision for or against purchasing either of these phones. While Maddox states emphatically that this is a matter-of-fact, unbiased review, it would not hurt to do some extra research.